Scott's Story

For the past fifteen years, I have lived my life consumed with self-destructive behaviors including the abuse of heroin, cocaine, and meth. My many attempts to escape this lifestyle over the years has been very difficult to pull off. What many people don’t understand about people like me is that we hate ourselves and are miserable. We want to change our lives but have burnt so many bridges and exhausted our resources to the point that it seems futile to expect or even hope for an opportunity to change. I had succumbed to the belief that this was my fate, that this was who I would be until I died.

Over the last few years, I have lived under Spokane overpasses littered with used syringes and the pungent smell of human urine and feces. I have witnessed many close friends die by overdoses…..at times I even envied them because, for them, the hell was over. I knew that wherever they were it had to be better. I have also lived among prostitutes and drug dealers.

But, it was this past November when the life (or what I called a life) unraveled. I had let a friend borrow my car in exchange for staying in his basement (shooting gallery) when he was arrested for loading a stolen air compressor into my car. When this so-called friend returned from jail the next day, I was told to leave the house. Cold, dope sick, and having an impounded car, I went to a local hotel to see another friend hoping he would get me a fix of heroin. But, when I got there my friend was engaged in a dispute with another guy. This guy shot my friend in the hallway where he bled to death.

I wandered the streets of Spokane until I saw that there was an open establishment where they hold midnight AA and NA meetings. I went in to keep warm and remember asking God to not let me die like this. After the meeting, I was approached by two women who said if I was willing they would help me. I agreed and got into their car. They brought me to their home in Coeur d’Alene where they let me detox on their couch. They also introduced me to a guy who helped me get into St. Vincent’s Men’s Shelter and made the necessary calls to put me on the waiting list for the Port of Hope. St. Vincent’s took me in, gave me a $20 voucher for clothing (which greatly improved my self-esteem) and allowed me to stay until my bed date at the Port of Hope. I was very malnutritioned and had sores all over my face that caused most people to look away or pretend they didn’t see me. But the Men’s Shelter put me back together with great food, a warm bed, and nice clean clothing.

Now, I attend regular meetings and even chair one meeting a week. I have gained employment and even bought myself a little truck to get to work and to my aftercare meetings at the Port of Hope. St. Vincent’s also helped me save my money so I could eventually get my own apartment and be a self-sufficient member of society.

It brings tears to my eyes when I think of that little prayer I said to God that night in Spokane. I didn’t know God lived in Idaho, but I know now that his main office is in a little men’s shelter in Coeur d’Alene. Thank you St. Vincent de Paul and thank you God. I am eternally grateful for the chance you gave to this homeless addict…you may have just saved my life.